Ten Things Said About Authors and What They Really Mean
1. I have never read any of the author's books.
The author writes better than I do.
2. I recommend this author to any fan of science fiction and fantasy.
The author and I are buds, as well as members of (fill in writer organization.)
3. The author creates great literature for the ages to come.
The author will put you to sleep faster than a sledgehammer to the back of the skull.
4. I can't remember the last time I saw a book by this author.
The author sells better than I do.
5. The author lays a strong foundation for a sequel.
Oops, the author forgot to end the book.
6. The author writes an evocative mood piece.
The author was plastered when she wrote this.
7. Author John Doe is the greatest (fill in country) novelist alive.
Author John Doe is pretty close to dropping dead.
8. The author hasn't lost his touch.
Oh, look, the author's meds finally kicked in.
9. The author writes as if in a delirious dream.
The author was plastered when he wrote this.
10. I envy this author.
I hate this author.