Wednesday, July 13, 2005

The Good, The Bad, and The Exhausted

We're down to the wire now.

While my good angel (GA) is still rejoicing that Hurricane Dennis passed by us and the rest of Clan Kelly, my bad angel (BA) is trying to estimate the track of (presently) Tropical Storm Emily, which may make U.S. landfall next week. Probably on the day the movers come for my furniture.

I am about to move into my dream house, GA reminds me. I am also about to hand over more money than I have ever spent in my life for anything, including ex-husbands, BA chimes in.

GA points out that my new domicile is situated between two gorgeous horse ranches in a tiny country town that is pastoral near-perfection. I will write in this place as I have never written before. The same place, BA sneers, that is 15 minutes from a decent hospital, where my kids will (again) go to new schools and and where I will (again) know no one. Have I completely forgotten, BA wonders, how horribly accident-prone I am, and that childhood fear of horses I've never quite shaken? What was I thinking?

(This is where GA gets into a snarling girlfight with BA, while I go read more of Andrew McCall's The Medieval Underworld and try not to think much.)

The kids are excited, the cats are gleefully playing kitty-in-the-empty-box, and my guy is his usual stoic self. Me, I'm staying busy. A busy PBW is a pleasantly exhausted, non-worrying PBW. Over the last couple of weeks I have packed up the rest of my household into too many cardboard boxes, and all that's really left is to go to the table, close, and move.

There's got to be something else around here I need to pack . . .

Like anything new, audacious and potentially wonderful/horrible, this requires a leap of faith. All I really have to do is keep my eyes open, the angels on either side of me, and dive in. The same way I do every time I pull out this keyboard and start to write.

You don't think those horses will jump the fence, do you?


  1. Anonymous2:51 AM

    I've never yet seen a recorded case of a horse storming a house and devouring a paperbackwriter.

    Not to say it couldn't happen, just, hasn't. But fortunately, I hear horses are easily swayed by treats of apples and sugar, so I think you'll have nothing to fear.

  2. Good luck with the move, PBW, that's a hard thing to do. Every so often I get the urge to move - I'm still looking for an affordable plot round here to build my perfect house on. But all I need to do is stick my head in the attic and the urge goes away. There's too much stuff up there to have been accumulated in just five years, surely.

    As a Pedant (with a capital P), though, I have to argue with Nico over apples and sugar. If you regularly feed a horse from your hand (doing it the correct way, with the flat of your hand so it doesn't bite your fingers, just as they teach in horse school), you end up with a horse that thinks it's going to get fed every time someone goes near its head. Whilst this is better than a horse that thinks it's going to get beaten, which makes it nervous and unpredictable, it is a horse that will tend to nibble and bite as it looks for those apples and sugar lumps, or mints, or clump of grass you've just pulled up from the verge.

    So talk to the horses, let them smell you, don't stare them in the eye and if they don't want to have anything to do with you, leave them alone. But please don't feed them unless it's from a bucket and it's their feeding time.

    Here endeth the lesson;}#

  3. Anonymous4:32 AM

    The Medieval Underworld... good choice.

  4. The thing to remember about horses is that they can get a bit rowdy with a drink in them. Keep your Gin and Vodka locked up and you should be OK.

    Oh, and make sure your cat flap is less than two foot tall. Shetland Ponies can get in otherwise and they’ll steal all your patchwork quilts.

  5. Anonymous6:49 AM

    I'm a city girl, what do I know about horses? I was applying the "anything can be bribed" philosophy.

    I'm still certain that horses don't eat paperbackwriters.

    I'm all for occasional bribes so that they don't try to eat you. I'm currently using a method of this on the next door neighbor's loopy Golden Lab in an effort to see me as bringer of food, Not "food."

  6. Anonymous7:38 AM

    Good luck with the move. Being a military brat - moves can be both good and new but always an adventure. Marie

  7. Anonymous9:30 AM

    Congratulations on your dream home! It sounds wonderful!

    As my riding teacher told me years ago, horses are like big dogs. They are willing to like you just because you're the person, and they're not inclined toward physical exertion (like jumping over fences) unless directed to.

    And if you worried about biting, only offer a flat hand. Most horse bites actually occur accidentally, when people offer treats with a curled up hand.
    :) Misty

  8. Will the horses jump the fence? Probably not. On the other hoof, while they appear to graze peacefully, they could actually be plotting in their little herd. "New human moving in, gang. Time to show her who runs things in this neck of the pasture. We'll show her that we put the neigh in neighborhood. One good charge and she'll be out here at the fence with treats every day -- just like we trained."


    Seriously, your new home sounds beautiful in a lovely setting. Enjoy!

  9. >I'm still certain that horses don't eat paperbackwriters.

    Actually, mine bites. (My fault; I spoiled him.) And those big grass crushing teeth are very hurty.

    Do check with the owners before giving treats. Carrots. Most horses love carrots. Not only can giving treats interfere with training, but...some horses are diabetic.

    Congrats on the new house!

  10. Good luck with the move. Hopefully the storm will stay away. I've done my share of moves, including one in a big heavy snowfall (and I love snow, usually) but hurricanes sound really bad.

    Horses don't jump fences, but they know how to open them. ;)

    BTW What's that with cats and cardboxes? Tambo had a cute pic of hers a few days ago, also happily sitting in a cardbox.

  11. Congrats on the new house!!!!

    That's exciting!

  12. On the horses ... well ....

    I guess I haven't mentioned that a mule released the horses across the street and they all came trotting over to visit us, leave gifts in the yard (FREE fertiziler!) and convince Matt that we were under attack. He's not a big horse fan, either, and swears the mule was eyeing him with evil in mind.

    So. Keep a carrot or a bolthole handy.

  13. Good luck with the move! All the horses I've encountered have been pretty much indifferent to me. They look at you as you pass by and then go on eating grass.

  14. Good luck with the move. It's so cool that you're getting your dream house. You could always deal with the horses by learning to ride one. Face the fear and all that stuff. (I know, I'm eeeevil.) :)

  15. Oh, I forgot that now that I have a weblog on blogger, it signs my user name. Mama Rose is Linda Sprinkle, same user name as everywhere else on the internet. :)

  16. Good Luck with the move! Just stay downwind from the horse farm and you should be a-ok! LOL

  17. Money pit, here you go ;-)


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