Ten Things That Instantly Bug Me, and (if I Know) Why
1. Artificial Tanning Products: Because they're dumb. Ladies, when you dye your hides with this glop, you don't look tan. You look orange. It fools no one. Stop it.
2. Balloons: PCBPGTSD (post childhood birthday party game traumatic stress disorder) induced dislike. It bugs me simply to hear them being inflated.
3. Being Fed: Have no idea why. Just let me eat my own food, thank you.
4. Grope-huggers: Dishonest. Either hug me, or cop a feel, don't try to do both.
5. Mouth-kissing Strangers: Fastidiousness. Besides, you don't know where my mouth has been.
6. Pantyhose: Discomfort. A man invented them as a torture device for big girls. And I would personally like five minutes alone with the genius who developed "Sheer Energy" pantyhose.
7. Pet Names for Grown Men like "Snookums": Please. I call the dog things like that.
8. Pointy-toed cowboy boots: Gratis Stephen King's The Stand. Since reading it, I've thought they were creepy-looking.
9. Talking or animated stuffed teddy bears: not a clue. I can't stand the damn things.
10. Underwire Bras: Distaste. They're horribly uncomfortable and too symbolic of what women used to do to their bodies. The corset died a long time ago; can we get rid of the last symbolic whalebone now?
What are some of the things that get a knee-jerk reaction out of you, and why?