Saturday, June 11, 2016

The Brotherhood

As always I reserve the right to make fun of anyone who SPAMs me, even when it's a secret society:

Are you a business man?

Nope.

Business woman ?

Yep.

Artist?

Sure.

Politicians?

No, thank you.

Student?

I have one of my own, thanks.

Etc...And you want to become Big and Rich, Protections and Powerful, famous, Promoting your Job office position and make your company product the most popular and best seller in the world, join us to become one of our official [kindness duct tape] brotherhood member today and you shall be given a chance to visit the [kindness duct tape] initiation center and his representative after registrations are completed by you,

I want to become smaller, actually. Did you know I've lost 26 lbs. since January? And I didn't join a church or anything. I thought brotherhoods were for men. Is English like your third or fourth language?

[kindness duct tape] brotherhood brings along wealth and famous in life, you have a full access to eradicate poverty away from your life now.

You ran this through Babel Fish, didn't you? Dude, stick a crowbar in the church donation box and hire a translator. Seriously.

It is only a member who has been initiated into the church of [kindness duct tape] that have the authority to bring any member to the church, so the [kindness duct tape] initiation for this year new members is available now Join us today and realize your dreams.

So this is like a pyramid thing, then. I become a member, and I bring another member, and then he brings another, and we all gather in your church and . . . initiate each other? Wait, are there like virgins involved in this?

Once you become a member you will be Rich true whatever you are doing on this planet as your occupation more ideals will be giving to you and protected and as an actor or actress Politicians you will be famous and powerful for the rest of your life, the [kindness duct tape] makes they members happy so

Okay, this is really starting to sound like a blackmail porn church.

Join and be one of the successful Person on earth

What about Mars? I'm thinking of going on one of those volunteer missions. Kidding. I read Ray Bradbury; I'd never willingly go to Mars.

if you are interested fill the form below to the below email address to enable the [kindness duct tape] registration department process your membership and an invitation for the initiation will be send to you wherever you are in any part of the World.

Send it to Mars. Better yet, take it to Mars.

6 comments:

  1. You get great spam, lol.

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    1. What's really spooky is that they use almost the same name for their church as I used for a secret society in one of my books.

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  2. Lol. Man, it's a rough world when even secret societies have to struggle with visibility and outreach. BTW I was at a booksigning today and some readers were talking about their "bow down" authors. And you were named! In case your ears were burning around 4 p.m. Pacific time. :)

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    1. Someone still remembers me? Ha. That's really nice, seriously.

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  3. You do get great spam, and your responses are so inventive.

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    Replies
    1. It keeps me entertained (and more fun than blocking or sending furious replies.)

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