Ten Cover Quotes, And What They Really Mean
1. "A very sweet, wholesome story."
If this book were any more PC, it could run as the Republican presidential candidate.
2. "An interesting male spin on a love story."
Is it okay to send the author's wife a sympathy card before he's dead?
3. "Fast-paced and pithy."
I've read more engrossing bumperstickers.
4. "I want all my readers to buy this book."
My editor wants all my readers to buy this book.
5. "I'm so excited by this author's promising new talent."
Less competition! Hooray!
6. "Say hello to the next great literary mind."
(yawn) Next time, send me the Cliff Notes.
7. "This novel is a non-stop wild romp!"
You know, I think I've had less fun on some of my honeymoons.
8. "This one is a blockbuster in the making."
Tell me when I die that I can come back as this author's heir.
9. "Unbelievably wonderful -- the best book of the year."
I quoted what? How drunk did I get at that conference, anyway?
10. "You won't regret buying this novel."
Until after you read it.