Showing posts with label mashups. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mashups. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Mash-O-Matic

New from Ranco: The Mash-O-Matic, the most famous automatic novel mashup maker on the planet!



Writers, we know you've seen these hot, trendy books on the shelves making their authors uber famous and bringing in tons of royalties; now it's your turn to enjoy the ease, convenience and endless profits of creating your own bestselling mashup novels with little to no effort at all!

The Mash-O-Matic comes with an instructional booklet that shows you exactly how to take any famous book in the public domain, add just a few new ingredients and combine them to create new, fun, highly marketable novels! The Mash-O-Matic is so efficient you'll only have to spend a few minutes a day compiling your next bestseller. Plus there’s absolutely no hassle involved: the foundation book for your mashup has already been completely written by someone else who's dead and can't sue you over it. All you have to do is add a few common story elements that are probably right now sitting unused on your hard drive in all those half-written books you'll never finish anyway!

Here are some testimonials from our very satisfied customers:

"Now that I have the Mash-O-Matic, I can concentrate on the most important aspects of my professional career as an author, like going to writer conferences, making luncheon speeches and being interviewed on NPR's Fresh Air. Ranco, where have you been all my writing life?" -- Ronnie Rashmouth

"I didn't believe writing a bestseller could be so fast and easy. By using the Mash-O-Matic to create my books I've been able to spend more time with my family, sleep better and still make thousands in royalties every month! I actually look forward to going to work every day!" -- Myrna Blecker

"I was going nowhere with my writing career when I found the Mash-O-Matic. Now I'm the proud author of three bestsellers: Les Mummies Miserables, A Tale of Two Dead Cities and Anne of the Oozing Green Gables!" -- Scottie UpChuck

Your new Mash-O-Matic comes with:

-- 5-novel capacity
-- patented novelmasher
-- Quiet operation
-- AG-approved trays for recomboed manuscript pages
-- Instructional booklet packed with suggested story elements
-- Ideal for conference guests of honor, six-week college workshop teachers and other busy writers on the go

The Mash-O-Matic also comes with powerful electrical story sorters and convection plot flow, uses 110 volts, 125 watts electricity, proudly made in the USA!

Here's a personal message to you from our President, Ranc Maykker: "Writers, isn't it time you stopped slaving over the keyboard, and had more fun as an author? Are those endless hours you spend trying to write original novels really worth it, when you don't even know if you can sell the finished product? Don't waste another minute writing the books you hope your readers will love, give them what you know they already love with the Mash-O-Matic."

But wait! As a part of our special introductory offer, if you order the Mash-O-Matic in the next thirty minutes, Ranco will also give you at no extra charge Ranco's famous EZReTitler Tool so you can rename your mashups, five manuscript mailers and a "I Mash, Don't You?" goldtone key ring. That's right, you get the fabulous Mash-O-Matic, the EZReTitler and all the extra goodies for just nine easy payments of $19.95! You'll earn that back in your first week on the Times Bestseller List, so don't delay, call right now!