A writer pal (you know who you are) recently suggested that I put warning labels on some of my novels. Nothing uptight or mean, but more along the lines of Do not drink beverage while reading Alexandra's dialogue, or have a copy of Endurance within reach before finishing reading final scene of Beyond Varallan.
I had to give it a whirl, of course, so:
1. Author is not responsible for impact damage to any walls because reader skimmed over or missed the puzzle clues.
2. Be advised that the seraglio scene in Evermore is highly flammable and was written while I was channeling Sasha White (this should drive her crazy until January.)
3. Don't try any of this at home. Especially don't try any of this on the back of a motorcycle going eighty on the freeway.
4. No real aliens were possessed, eviscerated or otherwise harmed during the pitching of Drednoc. One baking chicken was skinned, but we ate it for dinner.
5. Plot twists may be larger than they first appear.
And finally, the one everyone wants: Warning: this novel has a realistic ending.
If you had to put a warning label on one of your stories, what would it say?