Ten Things to Appreciate about Writers
1. Our book jacket photo is never taken when we're writing in the nude.
2. Most of us don't demand walk-on parts in the movies based on our books.
3. Our loved ones regularly talk us out of getting gun permits.
4. After what happened to Sylvia Plath, we rarely mate with our own kind.
5. We'll never really find out who writes those PW reviews.
6. We hardly ever run for political office, and when we do, we generally lose.
7. Halle Berry will never have to dodge any of us on Oscar night.
8. Writing is our only true religion.
9. We can't get along with each other so we'll never have a decent union.
10. We'd like to run the world, but we're horrible with money, so we never will.
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